Tag Archives: migraines

Fighting Lyme and Chronic Migraines

8 Jul

well, these two weeks have FLOWN by and now it’s time to update on how fabulously I’ve been feeling. Ha! Not fabulous, let me tell you that first off. Oy. But we were able to have a lot of fun over the 4th of July weekend! Thank you to everyone that came to our first BBQ! It was SO much fun and we had such a great turnout! OH (other half) and I look forward to hosting another one. We also got down to Bend to see family and friends for a few days and had an absolute blast. Family barbeque where the kids just couldn’t get any cuter. Abby learning to swim in the pond. Holding a sweet little baby. Line dancing at midnight. Dinner with my parents and Auntie and Uncle.  The fun continued right until we left!

 

Ok, I’ll quit playing with pictures and get to the update…. if you missed the first update, check it out!!

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Overall Health: I seem to feel either really good or really awful, there hasn’t been much of an in between these last few weeks. My memory hasn’t improved, which makes remembering to take the treatment hard! Sleep hasn’t improved either. My skin has slowly started to clear up, thank heavens! The house is staying in pretty good shape , now I’m dreaming of working in the yard and cleaning my car!

Treatment: I’ve been back on the Samento for 10 days now and good grief, it’d be nice if I could remember to take all 3 drops each day. I’m doing good if I take 2. I’m thinking I’m gonna have to set alarms on my phone… Remember, I have to wait half an hr after taking it , to eat. AHEM. Not cool, because I tend to remember when I’m sitting down to eat. sigh. I Will get the hang of this because I’m not reacting near as strong as before. I have run out of Riboflavin though, so I’ve Got to get some today, remind me of that will you? hehe.

Migraines: This might be TMI for some of you reading this and I’m sorry… Due to it being that wonderful time of the month, my migraines have been predictably severe. This morning I don’t have one but that hasn’t been the norm the past week and a half. The pain has been severe, and stayed so most of the day this past week especially.

Digestion: This past week I seem to have gotten past my stomach freaking out at almost every meal I eat. Which is a wonderful change.

TMJ: I don’t seem to be clenching my jaw during the day as much – at least I haven’t caught myself doing it like I was. It’s been popping more the last few days, and is super tender in the mornings. Hard to chew harder foods sometimes.

Mood: I feel more myself although I still tend to overreact to the littlest things.

Sleep: hasn’t changed at all – still have to take Melatonin or Theanine every night. Still wake up at least twice. I’ve been taking a  lot more naps since I got back on the Samento.

Brain Fog/Memory : Fog hasn’t been as bad as in the past but memory is deplorable. I’m still struggling to remember things I’ve always known, and to find the right word. Still haven’t been able to write much on my novel. Focus has been a little better in some situations, (able to watch movies now)

Daily Vitamins :

Still averaging 2 Clonidine a day (it’s been 3 a day these past several days though)

I’ve been trying to up my intake of Fish oil to 2 a day without reaction.

I’ve run out of Riboflavin, getting more today! Need to up my intake though

Seem to be doing fine off the Cordyceps

And that’s it! I’m gonna start working on the list of symptoms, I want to get it up before I go on vacation next week. This blog has wonderful info on Lyme disease, I’ve been following her for a few years now.

Do you have any tips on remembering to take the Samento? Or do you have direct experience with Samento? I’d love any advice!

Thanks for stopping by!

~Laura

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Truth for the Chronic Pain-er

9 Feb

This is me…

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For some more laughs at the expense of our pain-ness, check out my pinterest board, and then go enjoy that sunshine!

~Laura

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An Early Morning Health Update

15 Nov

I am surprised how quickly I got used to feeling some better. I don’t realize how nice it is until I have a week like this past one.

OY.

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My couch says ‘welcome back’. Abby the puppy says ‘why aren’t you playing with me’?  I have some fun projects in the works/waiting to be started and I just have no energy or motivation or ability to do them right now. Sigh.

I have found some things that help, typically, to cut the pain back much quicker than I hoped. They are natural, which I love. And I can take them once an hour – hallelujah. One is Pulsatilla and the other Belladonna. They look like little tiny beads, so if you hear me saying ‘i took the beads’, that’s what I’m talking about. Seriously, if I take Pulsatilla throughout the day and take Belladonna when the pain starts to get intense, on a normal, typical day   it’ll knock the severity out of the pain within half an hour. Which is brilliant, of course. But, on days like this past week, shrug. It doesn’t seem to touch the pain. I am so grateful it works majority of the time though!

I am also taking Xiao Yao San to help disperse the little black raincloud that has started forming over me these past months. I am so relieved that, most of the time, it helps. I am a laid back, happy person but, whoooeeeee! Something has gotten unbalanced in me because my mood has been….well. God has helped me bite my tongue and for that, I am grateful. Just this bit of a raincloud over me has made me think of people that struggle with depression and understand a tiny bit more what they are going through.

I started taking Berberine for the gut issues my new Dr. (yay a nice one!) thinks is the cause of a lot of my problems. But, my heart started thumping and my chest would get tender and tight. (I’ve had this periodically over the last 10 years, don’t freak out! it goes away after a while.) So, I had to stop taking the Berberine and overall the heart weirdness has stopped. I go back in beginning of December and I’m hoping I’ll get on something else to help heal my gut issues.

Let’s see – my blood tests showed I was low in several things so I am taking a few vitamins to get them up. I am excited because I just started taking an herb that is supposed to help with my energy levels! YAY!

We found out yesterday both our dogs have fleas and Lady is allergic to them. Which means if she’s awake she’s probably licking, scratching or chewing. Poor things. I am so glad I found a great vet that is just down the street from us, Lady loves them already. We didn’t have fleas in Central Oregon so it never even crossed my mind that that could be the problem! Welcome to the valley, eh?

I’m going to get back to writing on my novel, come back later in the week for a review on a great book! (if it means anything, it’s set in Ireland….scores tons of points right there for me!)

~Laura

 

 

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Give yourself Permission, It’s OK

21 Sep

Ah, the plans I had for today, friends, the plans I had.

I just conceded them to the inevitable and put my yoga pants (no, i don’t actually do yoga in them…) on. I have been trying to psych myself up to go run my errands and do some cleaning around the house but my body decided that a shower was all it could handle.  So I have come to the conclusion once again, that you just have to give yourself permission to not feel good and to do nothing.

If you’ve heard of the spoon theory, made typically in regards to Lupus, this is one of those days where I have started with less ‘spoons’ than normal, and therefore, must alter my plans.

(if you don’t know about this spoon theory, go check out this article)

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So, I’m going to continue laying on the couch with my dog snoring close enough I can reach out and scratch her head, with a cozy crocheted blanket over me and try not to notice the mess of my house or remember the list of errands that need doing.

Happy Monday and next post will be more on character development,

Laura

~if you want a great show on netflix that is worth binge-watching, over and over : Leverage. Interesting enough to keep you focused on it and not your pain but not too involved that you can’t keep up with it.

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Chronic Pain and its side effects

17 Jun

I try not to use SGL as a place to vent but i wrote this a few weeks ago and I keep feeling the need to share it here. Maybe it’ll help someone know they aren’t alone in their pain. Mom, get a box of kleenex, you’ll probably end up crying. Sorry.

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It is a bit dis-jointed, but I’m going to type it here just like I wrote it:

“I want to yell and scream at the world, no, at the ever-ending, swirling, devouring Pain. The Pain that not only claws at me day and night but the equally absorbing exhaustion that pulls at my legs as if I had two ball and chains dragging around behind me; that weighs down my shoulders making me bend like a wizened old woman who has lived such a full life that her back has aged less gracefully than her spirit; it stiffens my hips and arms – the exhaustion is just as consuming as the Pain but for some reason it’s not talked about.

The reason for any of my sanity remaining lies in three places.God, family and friends, and Pain pills. The pills is the one that gnaws at me, the relief so wonderfully given, I fear, will come at a costly price and each day that goes by, I fear just what it will be. To get through a day means to take them, but what about the rest of my life?

A mind dragged through persistent, severe pain eventually starts falling. Falling to that which we all fear when we reach our later years. Falling to an ever-constant awareness of Pain past, present and future. To live in the moment becomes almost impossible. To be feeling well now means it is time to prepare for the Pain that is coming. Falling to the realization of broken hopes and shattered dreams. Falling to comparisons – between you and anyone healthy. Eventually the splintered mind will cordon itself off- just to raise its chances of survival.

This. This is the life of chronic Pain. It is not just the brutal Pain that vice grips my temples- but it’s the slow deterioration of everything else- all while tenaciously holding on to the life I long for.”

I would add to this, on the positive side, that I do lead a wonderful life – I have a sweet husband who supports and takes care of me, a dog that loves me despite never getting out for walks anymore and so many genuine friends, new and old. The problem lies in not being able to chase my dreams, or even keep my house clean and food made because of what my body is doing. It has begun shutting out so many things in my life that daily I worry what else is going to get pulled from my grasp.

So here’s to essential oils and herbs, prescription pain pills and netflix, video games and absorbing novels, heating pads and soft blankets – that make it all a little easier to bear.

~Laura

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A Letter to the Weary

17 May

Welcome back to TSGL! It has been far too long since I’ve ‘seen’ you all! There are a few posts that are working their way to being posted for your enjoyment. letter to the weary

For today, I’m going to be talking to those that have chronic pain. My fellow sufferers – this letter is for you.

My vibrant friends, 

The pain is not you. You are still you – deep down inside perhaps, but you are still there. When you look back at who you used to be, it is so easy to bemoan how you have changed. Mourn it and then grow from it. You are most likely stronger than you were before -that is a blessing. Perhaps, like me, your faith has gotten stronger and deeper than it used to be. Be willing to grow and learn while you are in this trial – whether it lasts for a few more months, years or the rest of your life. Don’t let bitterness settle in your heart, for then, the pain will really have taken over who you are. But this, this you can fight. Find new ways to stay exactly the wonderful you that you are.

You still have a blessed, wonderful life – it might not/probably doesn’t look like the one you had dreamed of for yourself. But look around you for a second. You have a bed? A couch? Someone to help you out? Food? You are blessed. It’s like counting your blessings when you can’t fall asleep. I know so often the first things that run through my mind when I’ve stopped distracting myself, are all the things that I wish I could have done, or how I miss being able to work or how overly over it I am. Shockingly, those types of thoughts don’t exactly bring the positive attitude that we need to have! Count your blessings whenever you feel your optimism slipping.

Things really could be much worse. I try to remember that no matter how bad my pain gets, it could be much, much worse. While this one is a bit tricky for some of you, and it can be a bit…..what’s the word??? Anyway, I don’t mean that you look at someone around you and say ‘i could be them’ or such and such sort of a thing. I mean more in the sense of realizing that, for my example, while some days I have a really hard time walking just to get to the bathroom or kitchen, there are so many people that can’t even do that. It’s realizing that you are blessed even with the trial you are in.

Don’t stop living – learn that new hobby, read that book, test that recipe. Text or call that person that you’re missing. Binge watch that tv show. Yes, that last suggestion is easier now than it probably ever has been for you (well, at least for me it is!) but holding off on trying new things or doing something you love (and can still sort of do) isn’t good. It makes it all harder, honestly. No, don’t over-extend yourself, but don’t shut yourself up in a dark room constantly. It is the good days, the good moments, that make the pain a little more bearable.

Tell people when you’re in pain. Seriously. Don’t try and be ‘brave’ or ‘strong’ when you feel like the pain is completely consuming you. I’ve been there, done that and it is not worth it. Apparently I need random reminders of just how horrible it is to let each wave of pain crash over you while you suffer in silence. Just say it. “I hurt’ or my seemingly-common phrase these days ‘I think I’m dying’. For honestly, in those moments, I feel like I am. The pain is a swirling, crashing, dizzying thing that blocks anything else from view. By simply stating to someone who cares what’s going on, it can do at least 2 things for you – 1) help you focus on something else, like getting words past your clenched teeth.  And 2) they now have the opportunity to help you.

As a follow-up, thank your caregivers as often as possible. It can’t be easy to do everything that needs done, plus help take care of you – even if it’s once a week, or every day. I find that by thanking them, it helps me remember that they truly are blessing me. I also dream and plan of the day when I am healthy again and able to take care of my OH in the way he takes care of me. I cannot wait to be able to keep the house clean and meals ready for us. I can’t wait to be able to mow our lawns (is it weird that i love to do that?) and keep the cars sparkling clean. There are days of course, that dreaming of this isn’t a good idea, but sometimes, it helps thinking that maybe one day I’ll be able to bless him/them right back.

Don’t beat yourself up about having to take prescription pain pills. If you need them, you need them. Take them, but also tell your doctor that you’d love to get back off of them -do your research! Try natural options. I got on prescription pain pills about seven months ago and realized that feeling guilty about taking them was only making the days that much harder. Instead, I decided to be grateful that they helped me get through the day, but also to search for a new doctor that might be able to help me. As a result, I have done a bunch of tests this past month but I am happy to report that we have a better idea of what might be causing these migraines and the other issues I have going on. Inner ear fissure and too high of red blood cells. I’m on the low end of a lot of my blood work. My thyroid is fine, thank goodness, but it doesn’t help figure out the reason for the significant weight gain. Salt has been taken away from me – dont’ laugh but i almost cried when she told me that. Apparently salt can disrupt the balance of fluid in your inner ear – causing vertigo and other problems. Here’s a link I found that explains it well, along with other foods that can be a problem . So, I am cutting out as much processed foods as I can – I am doing this for a month – to see if it helps my digestion problems and even my dizziness.

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the journey is easier with a friend

Chronic pain is certainly not something that can be easily described, understood or lived through. But by sharing with those around us what is going on emotionally and physically, the load can be a little lighter. Be thankful for your life and still live it as well as you can.Be thankful for those that care for you and show that in little ways – texts or phone calls asking how you are, cleaning, cooking, walking your dog, shopping for you, driving you to doctor’s appointments – don’t let any act of kindness go without at least a hug. Find someone who you can gripe to on your bad days and rejoice with on your good ones. Be emotionally present for people, even if you can’t physically be with them. We can still thrive in this life, this one filled with chronic pain – we just have to work harder at it.

I am contemplating starting a group for chronic pain sufferers – ideally migraine and related but I’m not sure if I want to limit it to that only. It is the bud of an idea right now, but it’s one that isn’t going away. It would be a faith-based group where I’d love all kinds of sharing to go on – prayer requests and praises, any helpful tips on easing pain, etc. Basically a place to vent when the pain is consuming and find encouragement and understanding. If you would be interested in such a group, let me know! Knowing that some ladies would want to join might help spur the idea into reality.

While at my doctor’s, I took a picture of the pain scale and thought that I would share it with you. Having a scale to go off of has helped me describe my pain level to my OH and the doctor.

letter to the weary

But for now, I want to say thank you. Thank you for taking the time to read this and I hope that it has encouraged you ,dear heart.

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Starting out the New Year with a whimper, some tears and a Bang.

6 Jan

starting out the new year with a whimper, some tears and a Bang

I have officially lost my mind. Apparently being on strong pain killers and playing video games the past few days does that to a person . I am, by nature,  a disorganized, laid-back procrastinator. To mess with that though, I went and made a ‘life planner’. To help with growing this little blog of mine and with my writing. To help (hopefully) with cleaning and starting up menu planning.  I also put in a ‘grocery price list’ to start tracking our grocery costs and help me find out where the best prices are for things. I am hoping it helps save some money in the food department! I love the idea of being organized, so maybe this will be the beginning of good things.  Once I get it all together, I’ll share it with all of you!

first put-together of the planner!

first put-together of the planner!

With the beginning of the new year, and a possibly-over-positive outlook on how I’ll be feeling, I have filled up my calendar with blog and writing commitments. A six month series to a first draft for my historical novel i’ve been working on ; a creative group on google plus is starting up again ; a couple of book reviews; a possible collaberation with my brother on a novel,  and I’m pretty sure there’s a few other things. Also planned a craft party with a few friends later this month that I still need to decide what I’m going to make! I’m contemplating these projects:  winter cheeks stick , hair gel or a chapstick holder. But I am really leaning toward these storage boxes, where you cover cardboard boxes with burlap! I’m wanting to make some small ones for our closet – for my collection of scarves and possibly for my sweaters as well. Of course, if I do that one, I’d better start saving some boxes!

For the first time ever (I’m completely free…. you were thinking it, I just helped),I made almond milk this morning!! It was so easy and fun and I’m loving the fact that there are no chemical garbely-gooks in it!! Once I have played with the recipe and gotten it just so, you can look for it here on the blog! I do want to invest in a nut bag though, using cheesecloth worked but I had to be careful that i didn’t drop bits of the pulp back in the milk. Which reminds me of another reason I am loving this, and that is that there is absolutely no waste – you can use the pulp as well! As almond meal, or grind it up (once you’ve dehydrated it, of course!) for almond flour.

starting out the new year

Another project I’m looking forward to has something to do with this :

starting off the new year

That’s right – circular knitting needles. I am going to knit me some slipper socks! I have never used circular ones, and am at the lowest level of beginner in knitting, so I am hopeful that they are a good first-project to do. If not and if any of you wonderful readers are experienced knitters, do you have any suggestions for me? I would be so grateful to hear them!

My last post I mentioned that I have some new plans and series coming to SGL. One of them will be starting very soon – as soon as I’ve gotten my schedule figured out and the first post written – and that is focused on the virtues that I want to cultivate in my own life and to encourage all of you to grow in as well! The Lord has been urging me gently to start this series and I feel that I am finally ready. I also want to start a monthly short story sharing – or parts of my novel I’m writing because I am super excited about it! I hope that’s enough info to wet your appetite and bring you back!

Thanks for stopping by,

Laura Starr

*quick note, i do not normally play video games that much but with recovering from the holidays and traveling and now these blasted debilitating migraines, I’ve found they are good to take my mind off the pain and keep me on the couch =) just so you don’t think i’m always playing video games!

starting off the new year

** I had to share this photo of my dog and her friend that came over to play…errrr, sleep. Aren’t they cute? Two old girls just chillin’

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When Chronic Pain Steals Your Joy

23 Jan

Pain.

We’ve all felt it in one degree or another throughout our lifetimes. Stubbing a toe. Smashing a finger. Or one that I am constantly doing -running my hip into the corner of our washing machine (i’m convinced the thing moves every now and then…)

But chronic pain is another thing entirely. This is an excerpt from webmd.com –

                  “Tens of millions of Americans suffer from chronic pain — pain that lasts longer than six months.

Chronic pain can be mild or excruciating, episodic or continuous,

merely inconvenient or totally incapacitating.

                      With chronic pain, signals of pain remain active in the nervous system for weeks, months, or even years.

This can take both a physical and emotional toll on a person.”

Over the last almost nine years of dealing with migraines and other health problems,  I have felt my share of the ’emotional toll’ that this pain causes. I am glad to say that I have been able to keep a positive attitude and outlook on life overall but the days when it feels like the world is about to crash and I can’t do anything to stop it? Yeah, those days aren’t fun.

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Take today for instance, I just got back from an impromptu lunch date with my OH but feel like I could just curl up in bed and not move until he comes home. Not only does the sleep sound divine (!) but there’s something about. . . sigh. Chronic pain sucks the life out of you at times. What do you do about it? Let it take you under and hold you there? Not a good choice, as appealing as that can sound sometimes. Here’s some of what I do to get me out of the black-vortex-life-sucking-negativity-thinking:

1 – get involved in an interesting story – be it a book, tv show, movie – getting your thoughts off the pain and the question “when will it end?’ is key.

2 – surf Pinterest for fun crafts or recipes or whatever interests you – but don’t go to the ‘exercise’ area…that might just make it worse.

3 – have your friend (or mom or relative! – anyone who you feel comfortable being in pain in front of) come over and just sit and talk. About what books you’re reading. What you want to do this summer.What the kiddos are up to. Whatever comes up. just relax.

4 – Take a nap! -This one is huge. Whether it’s a short one or a long one – whatever you can fit in. Take one. Sleep improves attitude ( have you been around young kids late in the afternoon recently? yeah. it’s a fact. sleep helps mood)

5 – Tell your spouse – this is one that I don’t do quiiiite as well at as I should. I can tell him I’m in pain but admitting my optimism is wavering? For some reason, that one’s harder. But it makes all the difference! Once they know, they know. You feel better for having told someone and they know not to say-that-one-thing-that-just-might-make-you-bawl-all-night. Just saying.

6 – This one should have been at the top honestly, but PRAY about it. God knows what we each are going through. And what better comforter could we have than the One who created us and loves us unconditionally?

7- Treat yourself – a hot bath, a special cup of tea/hot chocolate/coffee, pedi/mani. Whatever makes you smile, do it.

8- Remember it’s just how you’re feeling. Not reality. Honestly, this is a big one. It can be so easy to let our emotions take us wherever they lead, but they are often (read: quite often) wrong. Remind yourself that this is just a moment of doubt and frustration.

9 – Count Your Blessings. I love this one. I do it a lot when I’m in pain and am relegated to the couch once again. I have a wonderful husband. I am part of a crazy and big family. I have a warm and dry – and cute!- place to live. I have a cute puppy (all 80odd lbs of her) that takes naps with me. etc…etc…

10 – Do what you can to get rid of the pain – Again, this one should have been higher on the list…. You know what you can do to at least ease the pain. Do it! Even if it seems too much of an effort – it’s worth it. I drink tea, use essential oils, have eye/forehead pillows that all help alleviate the migraine.

It is a fact that long-term pain affects all aspects of the body. the mind/body link can actually make the pain worse. In my case, as one who suffers with migraines, sometimes the dreaded anticipation of one coming on can actually bring a migraine on. It’s a horrible cycle but it’s true. Another excerpt from webmd:

“Anxiety, stress, depression, anger, and fatigue interact in complex ways with chronic pain

and may decrease the body’s production of natural painkillers;

moreover, such negative feelings may increase the level of substances that amplify sensations of pain,

causing a vicious cycle of pain for the person. Even the body’s most basic defenses may be compromised:

There is considerable evidence that unrelenting pain can suppress the immune system.”

All this to say – don’t give in to the emotions that drag you down. It will, really, only make it all a whole lot worse. Stay positive, stay focused on what you’ve been blessed with – and please, eat a bit of chocolate for me?

I hope this helps friends. I know that chronic pain is something that affects a lot of us – and if you ever need a listening ear, I’m just a click away.

~Laura

* here is where I got the info from webmd : http://www.webmd.com/pain-management/guide/understanding-pain-management-chronic-pain

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Word Failure

4 Nov

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Have you ever sat down eagerly to write, write , write. But when you do – the cursor just blinks and you realize there are absolutely no words coming? That’s been my  weekend. I think I wrote one page all weekend. Yes, my OH was home and we had a busy two days of productivity and relaxing but…. now it’s a new week, the first full week of the nano challenge and I was/am really hoping to get going again on my novel. The only problem(s)? My OH headed out to work  for the week, I am out of dog food and a severe pain is implanting itself in my left temple and eye. Oy Vay.

Possible solutions: turn on the radio so the house doesn’t seem so empty,  feed dog some oatmeal and venture out later for a walk and buy dog food and drink ginger tea. Hopefully all will help to turn this day into a day of being productive rather than what I think it will be. A day of wandering aimlessly and craving a hamburger, fries and a shake. (that seems to be my new temptation lately…) 

 after updating my word count, i have 2,203 total. counts say: target words to type per day : 1,667. have 27 days left. 47,797 words left. at this rate i will finish the end of january. heh. all well! one step at a time!

Happy Monday! 

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